Imagine waking up with a pounding headache, a stranger next to you, and Mike Tyson’s tiger in your bathroom. Now imagine if, instead of downing a pot of coffee and taking a hot shower, your hangover cure started with a shot of Jägermeister.
Congratulations, you’re now a Republican in 2021. After a drubbing in November followed by a violent and violently stupid insurrection attempt in January, they are doubling down on a proven loser. It’s just weird to have the guy who just LOST the presidency remain the party’s undisputed leader. In our lifetime, one-term presidents (not to mention losing nominees) have been pushed out the door faster than Milli Vanilli. In 1981, nobody was clamoring for more Jimmy Carter. But Republicans just can’t quit the former president—no matter how much grief he has caused them (and the nation). To paraphrase Homer Simpson’s toast to alcohol, they see Donald Trump as the cause of, and the solution to, all of the party’s problems.
Now, in case you still think the Trump era was a rollicking party that Republicans should want to savor, a recap is in order: After losing his re-election, Trump’s efforts to overturn that free and fair election earned him a second impeachment. Along the way, Trump meddled in the state of Georgia, sabotaging not one but two U.S. Senate runoff races and almost single-handedly costing Republicans control of the Senate in the process. The very next day, he incited an insurrection in the U.S. Capitol where (among other things) rioters beat cops with an American flag. And the response from Republicans was… let’s have some more of that!